Mudders//So many words…
Don’t worry about me, just crying my eyes out as I type this. I don’t know where to start except that I feel so honored that I could do these pictures before we move. This family. I feel like I should end there because there is too much to say. (Also, so fitting to write this on 11/11).
Sarah stayed with us in the hospital when we had Ellie. Like. Literally spent the night on a tiny little cot beside our beds, serving us, praying for us, holding Ellie, and doing all the things that few have the courage to do. In the deepest and darkest and worst and most beautiful moments, they were there, front and center, fighting for our family and our girl. Bryan agreed to lead her sweet funeral which I can’t even imagine how hard it must have been..I surely could not have done it. I used to feel so much guilt having asked them to do so much in regards to Ellie, but now I know that it just made us closer. They are family. They cry for Ellie still and their experience with her was as close as close could be….it’s indescribable having friends who have seen her and held her and even helped Chris to bathe her before saying goodbye. I will never understand…I will just never understand that kind of selflessness. Moving away from them is going to be insanely challenging. I am confident that Sarah will be present at every one of my births. It’s basically set in stone. I secretly (not so secretly) hope there is a Tate/Mudder marriage in the future but I promise I’m not going to pressure anybody. JKItotallyam. Mudders, we love you. We love your family. It’s safe to say that I want to be just like Ruby when I grow up, and I want to be as patient and gentle as Ransom. There are few on this earth who love as deeply as you do.